tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-67250369472325516952024-03-14T14:42:50.484-04:00Mormon FathersFathers have a most sacred responsibility to preside over their families in love and righteousness; to provide for & protect their families. The purpose of this blog is to provide a friendly place to exchange ideas for how to become better fathers as we strive to bless the lives of our families.Unknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger71125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6725036947232551695.post-27996987773214811392012-09-02T11:46:00.002-04:002012-09-02T11:46:35.870-04:00Follow Fatherhood Forever on FacebookMormon Fathers is now <a href="https://www.facebook.com/fatherhoodforever">Fatherhood Forever</a> on Facebook. Why?<br />
<br />
<ul>
<li>Simplicity & Flexibility - a lot less time consuming, more personal, and much easier. Plus, I can do it from my phone and on the go!</li>
<li>Reach - readership of blogs is down. Facebook allows access to a much broader and diverse audience. While the purpose hasn't changed, I'd like to reach a more diverse audience (non-lds).</li>
</ul>
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<br />
Fatherhood is a divinely appointed role that lasts forever and its impact is beyond our capacity to comprehend or foresee. The purpose of Fatherhood Forever is to form a community to help one another become the best fathers we can be by sharing experiences, thoughts, and ideas. I also hope we can inspire our young men to prepare for the most important role in life and our young women to seek for the best in a future husband and help our boys become such.<br />
<br />
BECAUSE TODAY THE WORLD NEEDS THE BEST DADS EVER!<br />
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<br />
Visit us and give us your 'Like'<br />
<br />
Thank you!<br />
MarcelinoUnknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6725036947232551695.post-84727752250608454342012-05-06T23:28:00.000-04:002012-05-06T23:52:19.986-04:00Special Interview: What Two Little Girls Think About Their Daddy!<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjFqMGWHCGXexO0kA7F9W-GQjcQHhDwkfn6z5wqN0K4kLG5gFRQbHuBeVj3hOvC8VncdP1mVnmCOL6AbWW2nQMc5t7GbbwAwdn5FpkYOtK62rqRzlR9YP3EQ3lQ_c3SQoJrN9jtbNSmWWsN/s1600/IMG_3161.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjFqMGWHCGXexO0kA7F9W-GQjcQHhDwkfn6z5wqN0K4kLG5gFRQbHuBeVj3hOvC8VncdP1mVnmCOL6AbWW2nQMc5t7GbbwAwdn5FpkYOtK62rqRzlR9YP3EQ3lQ_c3SQoJrN9jtbNSmWWsN/s200/IMG_3161.jpg" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Sabey & Camille</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
Recently I had an unplanned opportunity to converse with two young girls about their dads. One of them was Camille (7 at the time and almost 8) my only girl. The other little girl was her cousin Sabey (who had turned 8 recently).<br />
<br />
While the same questions will no doubt elicit different answers from different young children, I think it is interesting to know how children perceive things. Here is my conversation, followed by a special treat they agreed to sing for me.<br />
<br />
<b>MF</b>: <b><i>Why do you love your daddy?</i></b><br />
<b>S</b>: <i>Because he is nice to me.</i><br />
<b>C</b>: <i>Because he has money to buy us food.</i><br />
<b>S</b>: <i>I also like my daddy because he helps us make dinner.</i><br />
<b>C</b>: <i>I like my daddy because he cares for me.</i><br />
<br />
<b>MF</b>: <i><b>What is something funny about your dad?</b></i><br />
<b>S</b>: <i>My daddy is funny because he says that all of us (his children) have to have 100 spankings a day, and when we do something fun, he says "remember the rules, no fun allowed!"</i><br />
<b>C</b>: <i>My dad is funny because whenever he sneezes, he sneezes a lot of times, like maybe 5 or 6 times!</i><br />
<b>S</b>: <i>What else is funny about my dad is that he sneezes really loud and when my little brother was a little baby, he cried when my dad sneezed.</i><br />
<b>C</b>: <i>My dad is also funny because he chases us around the house.</i><br />
<br />
<b>MF</b>: <i><b>So, when your dad makes something to eat, what is your favorite thing he makes?</b></i><br />
<b>C</b>: <i>My favorite thing that he makes is quesadillas.</i><br />
<b>S</b>: <i>My favorite thing that my dad makes is puffy pancakes (German pancakes), even though it takes about an hour to make, I think it's really good.</i><br />
<br />
<b>MF</b>: <b><i>What is one of your favorite memories with your dad?</i></b><br />
<b>C</b>: <i>One of my favorite memories is when my dad and I went on a daddy/daughter date to a restaurant in Mexico.</i><br />
<b>S</b>: <i>My favorite memory of my dad is when he baptized me. Also, on our first daddy/daughter date, we went to my girl dance.</i><br />
<br />
<b>MF</b>: <i><b>If your dad were a super hero, what would he be?</b></i><br />
Neither could answer the question. So I guess you know what that means!<br />
<br />
<b>MF</b>: <b><i>What is your dad really good at?</i></b><br />
<b>C</b>: <i>At making me laugh by tickling me and saying funny things and hmm, by...</i><br />
<b>S</b>: <i>My dad is really good at making laugh because he chases me around the house and tickling me.</i><br />
<br />
<b>MF</b>: <b><i>What is your dad really bad at?</i></b><br />
<b>S</b>: <i>My dad is REALLY bad at doing my hair (fast answer!). My dad is also really bad at doing ballet (laughter from both girls!)</i><br />
<b>C</b>: <i>My dad is really bad at remembering things...yes.</i><br />
<br />
<b>MF</b>: <b><i>If your dad were an animal what animal would he be?</i></b><br />
<b>C</b>: <i>My dad would be a horse because I love horses and I love to ride a horse.</i><br />
<b>S</b>: <i>If my dad were an animal he would be a fish because he likes to go fishing and loves to fish!</i><br />
<br />
<b>MF</b>:<b><i> Why is your dad awesome?</i></b><br />
<b>S</b>: <i>My dad is awesome because he is very funny and I he makes me laugh a lot and I like to laugh.</i><br />
<b>C</b>: <i>My dad is the awesomest dad because he likes to do interviews with me and I love it! It's so fun!</i><br />
<br />
Needless to say...this was a choice experience! To end this post, here they sing one of my favorite primary songs: "Daddy's Homecoming"<br />
<br />
<br />
<embed flashvars="audioUrl=http://dl.dropbox.com/u/46388901/Daddy%27s%20Homecoming.mp3" height="27" quality="best" src="http://www.google.com/reader/ui/3523697345-audio-player.swf" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="400"></embed>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6725036947232551695.post-47014948179562391322012-05-06T09:57:00.000-04:002012-05-06T09:57:36.868-04:00Fathers in the Scriptures: King Benjamin<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjTnQZFVb9rAP6jEyQf1eYOyn7m56bGBOHCQD2DJcJ4A_O959NOmtbJY1PYgizOvjS2MD4h39yjkWzAFrOiMWmZkMatfOm09jkVvVIuIlycbG9JUcdAnuV0FA7g7Fxt95awdzvvrTGuvHVs/s1600/king_benjamin.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="212" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjTnQZFVb9rAP6jEyQf1eYOyn7m56bGBOHCQD2DJcJ4A_O959NOmtbJY1PYgizOvjS2MD4h39yjkWzAFrOiMWmZkMatfOm09jkVvVIuIlycbG9JUcdAnuV0FA7g7Fxt95awdzvvrTGuvHVs/s320/king_benjamin.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
King Benjamin was probably the best or one of the best kings in recorded scripture. It is interesting that the first thing that Mormon highlights about this King was his teachings as a father to his sons (Mosiah, Helorum, and Helaman). What did he teach them (see Mosiah chapters 1 and 2)?<br />
<ul>
<li>His language (1:2)</li>
<li>About prophecies of their fathers (1:2)</li>
<li>Concerning the records or scriptures in the plates of brass (1:3)</li>
<li>About the commandments they were supposed to keep and the promised blessings (1:3, 7)</li>
<li>The mysteries of God (1:3, 5)</li>
<li>His testimony of these things (1:6)</li>
</ul>
Given other contextual information in this chapter, it is safe to assume he also taught his sons about covenants (1:11-13), the importance of temples (1:18, 2:1), sacrifice (2:3), family values (2:5-6), and service to others (2:17) among other principles.<br />
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So, what is the lesson? Whether we are kings or paupers, above our profession or vocation, our most important role next to being righteous husbands, is that of a father. Ours is the responsibility to teach our children just as this good king and excellent father did.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6725036947232551695.post-59709089958419597092012-04-26T12:22:00.000-04:002012-04-26T12:22:04.612-04:00Fathers in the Scriptures<br />
In the scriptures we find many examples of fatherhood. Who are the fathers in the scriptures? What can we learn from these fathers? How can we benefit from their examples?<br />
<br />
Below is a incomplete list of fathers (literally what I could come up off the top of my head). I'd like to explore specific examples of fathers and gleaned lessons for us today.<br />
<br />
Please add to this list and if you have specific lessons from a father in the scriptures, please feel free to submit it for posting.<br />
<br />
<b>Book of Mormon</b><br />
<br />
<ul>
<li>Alma (the elder)</li>
<li>Alma the younger</li>
<li>Jacob</li>
<li>Lehi</li>
<li>Mormon</li>
<li>Nephi </li>
<li>Mosiah</li>
<li>King Benjamin</li>
<li>Enos</li>
<li>Helaman</li>
<li>Others?</li>
</ul>
<br />
<br />
<b>Old Testament/Pearl of Great Price</b><br />
<br />
<ul>
<li>Adam</li>
<li>Noah</li>
<li>Abraham</li>
<li>Isaac</li>
<li>Jacob</li>
<li>Jethro</li>
<li>Isaiah</li>
<li>Eli</li>
<li>Others?</li>
</ul>
<br />
<br />
<b>New Testament</b><br />
<br />
<ul>
<li>Joseph</li>
<li>Father of young boy possessed by a demon</li>
<li>Father of the prodigal son</li>
<li>Others?</li>
</ul>
<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<b>Doctrine & Convenants</b></div>
<div>
<ul>
<li>Joseph</li>
<li>Hyrum</li>
<li>Others?</li>
</ul>
</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6725036947232551695.post-23265145897586389492012-04-21T22:35:00.001-04:002012-04-21T22:36:31.435-04:00Fathers & Duty to GodThe Duty to God program for the our teenage sons is a critical aspect of their spiritual, emotional, and physical development. This video is inspirational.<br />
<br />
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<br />
<br />
The question is...how can fathers best help their sons get interested and engaged in this inspired program? I am in as much need of help as anyone (ask my sons!), but here are some ideas...<br />
<ol>
<li>Include DTG progress as a regular item of discussion during Family Home Evenings. Set goals and follow up on previous accomplishments. Make the FHE topic related to what your son is studying or applying.</li>
<li>Take advantage of Sunday drives to collect fast offerings or do home teaching and discuss specific items or activities they are or should be working on.</li>
<li>Attend their Sunday quorum meeting or mutual activity to know how what they are doing as a quorum and find ways to coordinate your father/son work accordingly.</li>
<li>Get your own DTG booklet and go through it with your son. Example is the best teacher!</li>
</ol>
<div>
I need to improve in this important father responsibility and would love to hear your ideas!</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6725036947232551695.post-72453015427939443042012-04-19T21:53:00.002-04:002012-04-19T21:53:32.431-04:00Fatherhood Lessons From General ConferenceGeneral Conference is always a wonderful time for fathers to receive instruction. Here are some timely lessons I found pertinent for fathers from the April 2012 General Conference. If you would like to share other lessons I may have not caught, please do so!<br />
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<b>President Boyd K. Packer</b> (<a href="http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2012/04/and-a-little-child-shall-lead-them?lang=eng" target="_blank">And a Little Child Shall Lead Them</a>)<br />
<br />
<i>Husbands and wives should understand that their first calling—from which they will never be released—is to one another and then to their children...One of the great discoveries of parenthood is that we learn far more about what really matters from our children than we ever did from our parents. We come to recognize the truth in Isaiah’s prophecy that “a little child shall lead them.”</i><br />
<br />
<b>Sister Cheryl A. Esplin</b> (<a href="http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2012/04/teaching-our-children-to-understand?lang=eng" target="_blank">Teaching Our Children to Understand</a>)<br />
<i>This divine privilege of raising our children is a much greater responsibility than we can do alone, without the Lord’s help. He knows exactly what our children need to know, what they need to do, and what they need to be to come back into His presence. He gives mothers and fathers specific instruction and guidance through the scriptures, His prophets, and the Holy Ghost.</i><br />
<br />
<b>Elder Jeffrey R. Holland</b> (<a href="http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2012/04/the-laborers-in-the-vineyard?lang=eng" target="_blank">The Laborers in the Vineyard</a>)<br />
<i>I especially make an appeal for husbands and fathers...to, as Lehi said, “Awake! and arise from the dust … and be men.” Not always but often it is the men who choose not to answer the call to “come join the ranks.” ...Brethren, step up.</i><br />
<br />
<b>Elder Robert D. Hales</b> (<a href="http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2012/04/coming-to-ourselves-the-sacrament-the-temple-and-sacrifice-in-service?lang=eng" target="_blank">Coming to Ourselves: The Sacrament, the Temple, and Sacrifice in Service</a>)<br />
<i>Fathers, priesthood leaders, and quorum presidencies have a special responsibility to help Aaronic Priesthood holders earnestly prepare to perform their sacred sacrament duties. This preparation is made throughout the week by living gospel standards.</i><br />
<br />
<b>Elder David S. Baxter</b> (<a href="http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2012/04/faith-fortitude-fulfillment-a-message-to-single-parents?lang=eng" target="_blank">Faith, Fortitude, Fulfillment: A Message to Single Parents</a>)<br />
<br />
<i>Members and leaders, is there more that you could do to support single-parent families without passing judgment or casting aspersions? Might you mentor young people in these families, especially providing for young men examples of what good men do and how good men live? In the absence of fathers, are you providing role models worthy of emulation?</i><br />
<br />
<i>Now, there are, of course, some single families where it is the father who is the single parent. Brethren, we also pray for you and pay tribute to you. This message is also for you.</i><br />
<br />
<b>Elder Quentin L. Cook</b> (<a href="http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2012/04/in-tune-with-the-music-of-faith?lang=eng" target="_blank">In Tune with the Music of Faith</a>)<br />
<i>Religious observance in the home blesses our families. Example is particularly important. What we are speaks so loudly that our children may not hear what we say...We know that family scripture study and family home evenings are not always perfect. Regardless of the challenges you face, do not become discouraged.</i><br />
<br />
<b>Elder David A. Bednar</b> (<a href="http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2012/04/the-powers-of-heaven?lang=eng" target="_blank">The Powers of Heaven</a>)<br />
<i>Brethren, for a boy or a man to receive priesthood authority but neglect to do what is necessary to qualify for priesthood power is unacceptable to the Lord. Priesthood holders young and old need both authority and power—the necessary permission and the spiritual capacity to represent God in the work of salvation.</i><br />
<i><br /></i><br />
<i>Many wives are pleading for husbands who have not only priesthood authority but also priesthood power. They yearn to be equally yoked with a faithful husband and priesthood companion in the work of creating a Christ-centered and gospel-focused home.</i><br />
<br />
<b>President Henry B. Eyring</b> (<a href="http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2012/04/families-under-covenant?lang=eng" target="_blank">Families Under Covenant</a>)<br />
<br />
<i>Let me suggest four things you can do as a priesthood father to lift and lead your family home again to be with Heavenly Father and the Savior.</i><br />
<br />
<ol>
<li><i>First, gain and keep a sure witness that the keys of the priesthood are with us and held by the President of the Church. Pray for that every day. </i></li>
<li><i>The second imperative is to love your wife. It will take faith and humility to put her interests above your own in the struggles of life...I promise you that your love for her will increase.</i></li>
<li><i>Third, enlist the entire family to love each other. President Ezra Taft Benson taught: “In an eternal sense, salvation is a family affair. …“Above all else, children need to know and feel they are loved, wanted, and appreciated. They need to be assured of that often. Obviously, this is a role parents should fill, and most often the mother can do it best.”</i></li>
<li><i>The fourth opportunity to lead your family in the Lord’s way comes when discipline is needed. We can meet our obligation to correct in the Lord’s way and then lead our children toward eternal life.</i></li>
</ol>
<b>Elder M. Russell Ballard</b> (<a href="http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2012/04/that-the-lost-may-be-found?lang=eng" target="_blank">That the Lost May be Found</a>)<br />
<br />
<i>So what can we do to not become lost? </i><br />
<br />
<ol>
<li><i>First, may I suggest that we prioritize. Put everything you do outside the home in subjection to and in support of what happens inside your home. </i></li>
<li><i>Second, we need to do things in the right order! Marriage first and then family. Too many in the world have forgotten this natural order of things and think they can change it or even reverse it. Remove any of your fear with faith. Trust the power of God to guide you.</i></li>
<li><i>Third, husbands and wives, you should be equal partners in your marriage. Read often and understand the proclamation on the family and follow it. Avoid unrighteous dominion in any form. </i></li>
<li><i>And finally, use the family resources of the Church. In raising children, families can draw upon the help of the ward. Support and work in tandem with priesthood and auxiliary leaders, and take full advantage of the Church’s youth and family programs. </i></li>
</ol>
<br />
<b>Elder Larry Y. Wilson</b> (<a href="http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2012/04/only-upon-the-principles-of-righteousness?lang=eng" target="_blank">Only upon the Principles of Righteousness</a>)<br />
<i>We simply cannot force others to do the right thing. The scriptures make it clear that this is not God’s way. Compulsion builds resentment. It conveys mistrust, and it makes people feel incompetent...Wise parents prepare their children to get along without them. They provide opportunities for growth as children acquire the spiritual maturity to exercise their agency properly. And yes, this means children will sometimes make mistakes and learn from them.</i><br />
<br />
<b>Elder Neil L. Andersen</b> (<a href="http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2012/04/what-thinks-christ-of-me?lang=eng" target="_blank">What Thinks Christ of Me?</a>)<br />
<i>Jesus asked the Pharisees, “What think ye of Christ?”2 In the final assessment, our personal discipleship will not be judged by friends or foes. Rather, as Paul said, “We shall all stand before the judgment seat of Christ.”3 At that day the important question for each of us will be, “What thinks Christ of me?”</i><br />
<br />
<b>President Thomas S. Monson</b> (<a href="http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2012/04/as-we-close-this-conference?lang=eng" target="_blank">As We Close This Conference</a>)<br />
<i>My dear brothers and sisters, may your homes be filled with love and courtesy and with the Spirit of the Lord. Love your families. If there are disagreements or contentions among you, I urge you to settle them now. </i><br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6725036947232551695.post-15865270270076384112012-03-25T22:39:00.000-04:002012-03-25T22:39:12.267-04:00Badge of Honor<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFWkJu-WY4pjBjWuDiJYfWY9JWtXxrYT9Hv9qvlGaXkxpn3CR2M43Qut0TmIFJWxTFi75z7CQwXWWjyR_tNnWLpwd6zjNPqZ49Fx8EfHf2PFsVqnBiljohHaHkCoXo5aytBwNQNFMuRap4/s1600/Badges.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFWkJu-WY4pjBjWuDiJYfWY9JWtXxrYT9Hv9qvlGaXkxpn3CR2M43Qut0TmIFJWxTFi75z7CQwXWWjyR_tNnWLpwd6zjNPqZ49Fx8EfHf2PFsVqnBiljohHaHkCoXo5aytBwNQNFMuRap4/s200/Badges.jpg" width="132" /></a></div>A badge of honor is a medal or a token that signifies an awarded honor or distinction (source: <a href="http://dictionary.reference.com/">dictionary.com</a>). Police have them, military personnel wear them, firefighters wear them, boy scouts earn them and display them with pride.<br />
<br />
A couple of weeks ago I saw a friend at church with his little boy peacefully sleeping in his arms. The little boy rested his tiny head on his daddy's shoulder. My mind raced back about 15 years when our fist son Helaman was a little baby. I've always loved holding my little ones in my arms. This one memorable morning, he was peacefully sleeping and drooling on the lapel of my Sunday suit, the only one I owned at the time. Back then we could hardly afford dry cleaning so, I tried to be very careful not to get my suits dirty. But with a new little boy, spit up and drooling at church were common place and I learned to not only live with it but to cherish it. And so, the stain became a badge of honor, something that I was proud to display as a dad. Now, every time I see a dad with a 'baby mark' on his suit, I feel admiration for that dad who takes care of his little ones and cares more about his child than having a spotlessly clean suit every Sunday morning.<br />
<br />
So, dad, wear the badge with honor!<br />
<div><br />
</div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: xx-small;">(Photo by <a href="http://www.freedigitalphotos.net/images/view_photog.php?photogid=172" target="_blank">Maggie Smith</a>)</span></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6725036947232551695.post-48912541832794014652012-03-20T16:46:00.000-04:002012-03-20T16:46:05.197-04:00He's Just a Dad<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhXRud3nEl4E9ceJTxhVmOHqH5iZNI4yYUblxX27AiRLR3ad2HtWcK8CxT7RYXYnJDedLMMzUJKeia-DFWS9CSLC48aalutT2SwLwdKJRybkWgr51HrXDhom8QoZ8IBCacKcDCjPc05XOD/s1600/IMG_2900.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="149" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhXRud3nEl4E9ceJTxhVmOHqH5iZNI4yYUblxX27AiRLR3ad2HtWcK8CxT7RYXYnJDedLMMzUJKeia-DFWS9CSLC48aalutT2SwLwdKJRybkWgr51HrXDhom8QoZ8IBCacKcDCjPc05XOD/s200/IMG_2900.JPG" width="200" /></a></div>Recently, after another successful week of working with a client from out of town, I felt great about the work we had done. The client was happy and I felt gratified about the work! The next day, Saturday, I took my two youngest children to the playground. We had a great time and they were oblivious to the fact that, to my clients, I am the guy who helps them solve messy problems. To my children, I'm just their dad. <br />
<br />
It reminded me of another dad I know. After attending a high profile event where he received the accolades of many important people, he returned home to help with the laundry, comfort children, and play with them. His wife was ready to get his help. His children were ready to have their dad back! For them as for my children, he was just their dad, the most important man in the world for them. <br />
<br />
So if your children don't appreciate all the awesome things you do outside the home, and just treat you as their dad, take it as a compliment. Dad is the most important man in the world!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6725036947232551695.post-52111663604161235912012-03-17T16:04:00.000-04:002012-03-17T16:04:58.805-04:00Building Bridges<div class="ennote"><table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://mormonchannel.org/sites/default/files/Con35-callister-01.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="133" src="http://mormonchannel.org/sites/default/files/Con35-callister-01.jpg" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Sister Kathryn Callister and<br />
Elder Tad R. Callister.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">Recently I listened to an interview with Elder and Sister Callister on the <a href="http://mormonchannel.org/conversations/35" target="_blank">Mormon Channel (Episode 35)</a>. In the interview, Sister Callister tells a story about how she connected with her teenage son with whom she felt she had lost a connection. One day she saw a sports magazine and realized that her son loved sports while she didn't know anything about them. She started reading articles and discussing them with her son. She became so well informed that one day her son told his father "dad, mom knows a lot about sports!" (he says "little did he know!") </div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">Mother and son became great friends! </div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">What have you tried to create bridges with your children? Here are a few things I have tried to do with them individually to build bridges...</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"></div><ol><li>Take them out for breakfast</li>
<li>Play video games (seldomly but it does happen!)</li>
<li>Go to the gym and work out together</li>
<li>Listen to music together (yes, I actually enjoy some of their music)</li>
<li>Discuss apps and experiment with our iPads/iPhones</li>
<li>Chill and talk (usually while eating some treat or playing a board game)</li>
<li>Joking and horsing around. Nothing like good fun!</li>
</ol><div>How about you? What do you do to build bridges with your children?<br />
<br />
I'd love to hear your ideas!</div></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6725036947232551695.post-44445302722944255672012-03-10T22:31:00.000-05:002012-03-10T22:31:58.000-05:00The Traditions of the Fathers<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpbmlL5CcsNesN2HxoNqX8hhkNsmAkKqjMT9HE9X9-d7wTbBPHvDx3C9B7QqofxFkWf82u9W2kHiNM38CK6W5wnWzphmNNWNrMkSuZV7bSvJk8lBArZfIyUf7_M_LDRkUQy-xz6fn_TTQr/s1600/Happy_Family.gif" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="133" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpbmlL5CcsNesN2HxoNqX8hhkNsmAkKqjMT9HE9X9-d7wTbBPHvDx3C9B7QqofxFkWf82u9W2kHiNM38CK6W5wnWzphmNNWNrMkSuZV7bSvJk8lBArZfIyUf7_M_LDRkUQy-xz6fn_TTQr/s200/Happy_Family.gif" width="200" /></a></div>Some years ago, during one of my regular church visits, I visited a family. The husband, after a long hard day of work (he was a mechanic), was relaxing in his lazy boy eating and watching TV. Soon after I entered the home I heard him call to his loving wife 'woman, get me some more water!' in a rather demanding voice. His wife complied. They were a happy couple, faithful to each other, active in the church. They were good people. It was just the way they lived, it was part of their culture.<br />
<br />
In the <a href="http://www.lds.org/ensign/2012/03/the-gospel-culture?lang=eng" target="_blank">March 2012 Ensign</a>, there is an article by Elder Dallin H. Oaks' titled The Gospel Culture. Speaking of our need to rid ourselves of cultural traditions inconsistent with the gospel Elder Oaks said:<br />
<br />
<i>Some husbands...have the false idea that the husband rests while the wife does most of the work at home or that the wife and children are just servants of the husband. This is not pleasing to the Lord because it stands in the way of the kind of family relationships that must prevail in eternity and it inhibits the kind of growth that must occur here on earth of we are to qualify for the blessings of eternity. Study the scriptures and you will see that Adam and Eve prayed together and worked together (see Moses 5:1, 4, 10-12, 16, 27). That should be our patter for family life--respecting each other and working together in love.</i><br />
<br />
Question: what are some of the traditions of our fathers (or mothers) that we need to change for the sake of our families?Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6725036947232551695.post-46840930559828603942012-03-07T22:53:00.001-05:002012-03-07T22:53:54.762-05:00It's Been One Year!!One a year ago exactly (it's leap year!) I started this blog. The blog itself is widely read in many countries (but mostly in the U.S.) and I believe it's reaching people I would not have imagined would read this blog. Last August the Spanish version of the blog went live and has become more widely and frequently read than the English version, something which I didn't anticipate. Though it takes twice as long to publish in both languages, I intend to keep doing it.<br />
<br />
To celebrate, I'd like to recommend the all-time five most popular English version posts of the last year.<br />
<ol><li><a href="http://mormonfathers.blogspot.com/2011/05/father-profiles-karl-hawes.html" target="_blank">Father's Profiles: Karl Hawes</a> - this was such great story and he gives great advice. Highly recommend this post.</li>
<li><a href="http://mormonfathers.blogspot.com/2011/10/should-i-stay-or-should-i-go-its-choice.html" target="_blank">Should I Stay or Should I go? It's a Choice!</a> - I know this one created discomfort and much thinking. This is one of the posts that has created the most comments (mostly on the LinkedIn groups where I posted the article. </li>
<li><a href="http://mormonfathers.blogspot.com/2011/05/and-they-cheered-on.html" target="_blank">And They Cheered On...</a> - account of my first 25K. I'm getting ready for another one!</li>
<li><a href="http://mormonfathers.blogspot.com/2011/03/top-10-things-i-wish-id-known-as-young.html" target="_blank">Top 10 Things I Wish I'd Known as a Young Dad</a> - this was one of my very first posts. One of these days I'll write the sequel...<i>10 Things I Wish I'd Known as a Dad of Teenagers!</i> If you have any good ideas here, I'm all ears!</li>
<li><a href="http://mormonfathers.blogspot.com/2011/04/my-fathers-day.html" target="_blank">My Father's Day</a> - an birthday homage to my own father whom I admire and love for being the best dad for me!</li>
</ol><div>It's been fun, interesting, and most of all, I think writing has probably helped me the most. Comments are few (I know that blogger makes it hard to leave comments) and subscribers even fewer but I have heard from readers via email telling me they appreciate the content. I am grateful for those that read this blog even if it's only occasionally. I hope it helps someone out there. So if you wouldn't mind, please take 10 seconds and leave a comment and tell me what you think and how to make this blog better. Look forward to another year of being and improving as a dad!</div><div><br />
</div><div>Take care of what matters most!</div><div><br />
</div><div>-Marcelino</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6725036947232551695.post-15561380182394466692012-03-03T09:24:00.001-05:002012-03-03T09:25:42.966-05:00A Reminder of the Importance of Fathers<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhM-aFFHBIP7zVdlmA9-SP2-eowCrskXfHxRSmRX-uamM8Qn0hbGZZcPYt8wJz5FvbVvrIcZRhgoabfZ0OSDapJhPueeG9t_oT60jwwHJBiBhEDEXAP_olJg6EZJCUNZWuQ6UBDQG2iWs4r/s1600/3351581067_5765345e0f_b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhM-aFFHBIP7zVdlmA9-SP2-eowCrskXfHxRSmRX-uamM8Qn0hbGZZcPYt8wJz5FvbVvrIcZRhgoabfZ0OSDapJhPueeG9t_oT60jwwHJBiBhEDEXAP_olJg6EZJCUNZWuQ6UBDQG2iWs4r/s200/3351581067_5765345e0f_b.jpg" width="132" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Photo by <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/csb555/" target="_blank">heymarchetti</a></td></tr>
</tbody></table>The tragedy in Chardon Ohio (<a href="http://www.wfmz.com/news/Ohio-high-schoolers-head-back-to-class-after-fatal-shooting/-/121458/9198126/-/item/0/-/k3eayrz/-/index.html" target="_blank">see news report</a>) is a stark reminder of how important fathers are in the life of children. <br />
No matter how one looks at it, statistics show (<a href="http://www.fathers.com/content/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=391" target="_blank">see one of many examples</a>) that fatherless children are at a much higher risk of all kinds of problems such as...<br />
<br />
<ul><li>Become involved in crime</li>
<li>Higher incarceration rates</li>
<li>More violent and deviant behavior</li>
<li>Higher probabilities of being victims and/or perpetrators of abuse</li>
<li>Premarital sex</li>
<li>Continue the pattern of fatherlessness</li>
</ul><br />
The list goes on...<br />
<br />
And while (thankfully) not every child without a father will end up bringing a gun to school and shooting others, there is no question that EVERY child needs a daddy in their life.<br />
<br />
And while most of us may at home dads, all of us need to be present in our children's lives. <br />
<br />
Dads matter!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6725036947232551695.post-1052096135566612502012-02-26T23:53:00.000-05:002012-02-26T23:53:39.471-05:00Glimpses of FatherhoodToday I saw inspiring fathers...<br />
<br />
A recently widower father coming into the chapel with his four beautiful little girls, all with their hair expertly done and wearing beautiful dresses. The weight of his responsibility evident on his face showed a determination to continue to provide for his daughters a legacy of faith. That was inspiring!<br />
<br />
A beloved leader expressing how serving his dear wife has helped him realize how much he loves his wife who is battling a serious and debilitating illness. While carrying the load of his work and church responsibilities, he treats his young children with love, compassion, and patience. That was inspiring!<br />
<br />
A proud father smiling as his recently baptized daughter is presented to the congregation as the newest member of the ward. Able and worthy to exercise his priesthood, he was able to baptize her and confirm her a member of the church. That was inspiring!<br />
<br />
A dad brimming with obvious delight sitting next to his recently returned missionary son at priesthood opening exercises. They chat and smile enjoying the companionship of the other. That was inspiring!<br />
<br />
A dad surrounded by his five beautiful girls and wonderful wife on his birthday, hears from them how wonderful a dad he is. That was inspiring!<br />
<br />
There are many dads all around us. None of them perfect, but many of them inspiring because they are doing their best to be the best dads they can be. Today I saw these little glimpses of fatherhood and it was inspiring!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6725036947232551695.post-52496281980817852062012-02-20T06:14:00.000-05:002012-02-20T13:51:25.450-05:00Are My Children Fatherless?Maybe a more appropriate way to ask this question is "how are my children fatherless? Since my last post, I've been thinking a lot about this question. I'm convinced that the father doesn't need to be physically absent from the home for children to experience fatherlessness. For instance...<br />
<br />
<ul>
<li>When our hobbies take too much time and precedence over our family...they may be fatherless!</li>
<li>When our job or church/community service make us strangers to our families...they may be fatherless!</li>
<li>When we are too busy to recognize our children's emotional needs...they may be fatherless!</li>
<li>When we can't connect with them or feel like we don't know them any more...they may be fatherless!</li>
<li>When we find it easier to be away from home...they may be fatherless!</li>
<li>When our children look to others for advice, approbation, or caring...they may be fatherless!</li>
<li>When they learn about what's most important in life from Facebook, friends, video games, and other media more than from us....they may be fatherless </li>
</ul>
<div>
The thing is...it starts with the small things.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Then, let us take care of the small things and give our children a father every day of their lives.</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6725036947232551695.post-63411437561185798702012-02-18T09:01:00.000-05:002012-02-19T22:18:07.192-05:00Courageous FathersFather's Day speech in the movie "Courageous"<br />
<br />
<i>"Our prisons are full of men and women who have lived recklessly after being abandoned by their fathers. Wounded by the men who should have loved them the most. Many of these children now follow the same pattern of irresponsibility that their fathers did. While so many mothers have sacrificed to help their children survive, they were never intended to carry the weight alone. We thank God for them. But research has proven that a child also desperately needs a daddy! There is no way around this fact. </i><br />
<i><br /></i><br />
<i>"I now believe that God desires for every father to courageously step up and do whatever it takes to be involved in the lives of his children. But more than just being there providing for them, he is to walk with them through their young lives and be a visual representation of the character of God, their father in Heaven. A father should love his children, and seek to win their hearts. He should protect them, discipline them, and teach them about God. He should model how to walk with integrity and treat others with respect. He should call out his children to become responsible men and women who live their lives for what matters in eternity. </i><br />
<i><br /></i><br />
<i>"Some men will hear this and mock it, or ignore it. But I tell you that as a father, you are accountable to God for the position of influence He has given you. You can't fall asleep at the wheel, only to wake up one day and realize that your job or your hobbies have no eternal value, but the souls of your children do. </i><br />
<i><br /></i><br />
<i>"Some men will hear this and agree with it, but have no resolve to live it out. Instead, they will live for themselves and waste the opportunity to leave a Godly legacy for the next generation. </i><br />
<i><br /></i><br />
<i>"But there are some men, who regardless of the mistakes we've made in the past, regardless of what our fathers did not do for us, will give the strength of our arms and the rest of our days to loving God with all that we are, and to teach our children to do the same, and whenever possible to love and mentor others who have no father in their lives but who desperately need help and direction. </i><br />
<i><br /></i><br />
<i>"We are inviting any man, whose heart is willing and courageous to join us in this resolution. In my home, the decision has already been made. You don't have to ask who will guide my family, because by God's grace, I will. You don't have to ask who will teach my son to follow Christ, because I will. Who will accept the responsibility of providing and protecting my family? I will! Who will ask God to break the chain of destructive patterns in my family's history? I will! Who will pray for and bless my children to boldly pursue whatever God calls them to do? I am their father, I will!</i><br />
<i><br /></i><br />
<i>"I accept this responsibility and it is my privilege to embrace it. I want the favor of God and His blessing on my home. Any good man does. So, where are you men of courage? Where are you fathers who fear the Lord. It's time to rise up and answer the call that God has given to you and to say I will. I will! I will!</i><br />
<i><br /></i><br />
<i>"But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord"</i><br />
Joshua 24:15<br />
<br />
There is truth all around us, if we will look for it. And this movie was worth watching!<br />
<br />
Here is the movie trailer...<br />
<br />
<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="280" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/MKtO_yAYEQM" width="475"></iframe>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6725036947232551695.post-6328517716102656132012-02-12T21:48:00.000-05:002012-02-12T21:48:15.179-05:00All That Noise...I'm Going to Miss It Some Day<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJ2T4rh4h6ykK7p7Bv9BuXowPB79l8Mc2ij9-LAmHGzKyb1GWQ5pPLPh5SZJiE_jFmaHWZnOrrKiWWwCBiQFD5XGEIwgM9CX8RcjkDKNbyXj0iAG0fuZjHhVoWPbUAW-wMaxGmBndm5-kv/s1600/Fam+in+TimesSquare.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJ2T4rh4h6ykK7p7Bv9BuXowPB79l8Mc2ij9-LAmHGzKyb1GWQ5pPLPh5SZJiE_jFmaHWZnOrrKiWWwCBiQFD5XGEIwgM9CX8RcjkDKNbyXj0iAG0fuZjHhVoWPbUAW-wMaxGmBndm5-kv/s320/Fam+in+TimesSquare.jpg" width="208" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Our crew in Times Square</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
No, our house is no museum where everything is always orderly, clean, and quiet. It's more like a workshop! And on a Sunday afternoon when I'd like to enjoy a little bit of peace and quiet, I hear laughter, bantering, two children running around, one chasing the other, someone screaming 'stop!!', someone playing piano in the family room, all at the same time! Yes, a house with five children is no museum. So, today as I had a split second to be by myself in my bedroom, I observed, some day I will miss all this noise.<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
That was in my mind because earlier in the day, a friend of mine commented to me that his children are all gone now and the only thing he has left are pictures and videos. I'm sure he and his wife enjoy life in this new phase of life. But he told me he missed his children and I could tell he did. Then his wife added "when you have young children, that is your whole life!...then they leave and you don't know what to do with yourself."</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
So, there are at least two risks here...</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
On the one hand, 'putting up' with the mundane things of everyday life such as driving children around, making lunches, helping with homework, going to their activities, reminding them to put their coats up on the hanger for the 100th time, the never ending chores, etc. may keep us from truly enjoying this wonderful stage in life when the children are still at home.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
On the other hand, letting that be 'life-as-we-know-it' may keep us parents from developing a relationship with our spouse independent from our children.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
So, I'm determined to do a little better at both, enjoying the noise of life and more purposefully developing a relationship with my wife that is not centered around our child rearing tasks only.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
After all, someday they will be gone and my house may look more like a museum, always orderly, clean, and quiet. And when that day comes, I hope to sit next to my wife and enjoy the videos, pictures, and good memories of all the noise my children make today. In the meantime, I'm happy with my workshop, noise and all!</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6725036947232551695.post-41026762407454505712012-02-09T23:24:00.000-05:002012-02-09T23:24:57.345-05:00A Child's Prayer: What I as a Father Learned From My Little One<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhe1zZu7PCE3aalhNP9eq3PIY8qGWXCoxzBUpAtDrD70UXxZ1GHcDSwRCrIQeOkn2ugKlx2gQS8LwBcfFh2IRTQiQKNzPa_rsm3iWV12JApqFuV4sTFyJA7QinEeOYdqRqagChazJBHfCFu/s1600/IMG_2811.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="191" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhe1zZu7PCE3aalhNP9eq3PIY8qGWXCoxzBUpAtDrD70UXxZ1GHcDSwRCrIQeOkn2ugKlx2gQS8LwBcfFh2IRTQiQKNzPa_rsm3iWV12JApqFuV4sTFyJA7QinEeOYdqRqagChazJBHfCFu/s200/IMG_2811.jpg" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Luke & Helaman around the time<br />of the incident.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
Recently we read as a family the account of Nephi breaking his bow and the whole family suffering hunger because of it. It always strikes me as interesting that after he makes a new bow and arrow, he goes to his father, the patriarch, the prophet, Lehi to ask for direction "Whither shall I go to obtain food?" Lehi asked the Lord and learned a lesson that I think he always remembered.<br />
<br />
As I thought about this event, I thought about how Lehi was humbled and learned a powerful lesson because of his son's gentle invitation. And then I remembered a similar experience that happened to me many years ago when my first son Helaman was about 4 years old.<br />
<br />
We had been shopping. It was a late and chilly January night. Kelly, Helaman, and Luke (who was one then) waited in the car as I made one last quick purchase. When I came back I discovered that Helaman had stuck the wrong key in the ignition (what?). After a lot of effort, the key finally came out but when I try to insert the right key, the key wouldn't turn, it didn't even go all the way in as normal. I spent the next several minutes trying different things but to no avail. As each minute passed, and it kept getting late, and colder in the car, my frustration grew. And just at the wrong time (for me), Helaman said in his innocent little voice: "Dad, why don't we say a prayer?"
Being in the state of mind that I was, I felt no desire to pray, so I said without really meaning it, "okay, why don't YOU pray?"<br />
<br />
As my little boy started praying, guilt came over me and then concern. What is he going to think when he realizes that the key will not turn simply because he said a prayer? I didn't want his faith to be shaken. In truth, at that moment, it was my faith that was absent, not just shaken.<br />
<br />
He finished his prayer.<br />
<br />
Nervously and hesitantly I turned the key. Slowly.<br />
<br />
This time, it didn't resist at all.<br />
<br />
The car started!<br />
<br />
At that moment I felt a spirit of peace come over me. Not just because the car had started. I felt relief yes. But what I felt was more like a gentle rebuke of love that reassured me that God listens to prayers, particularly those of His little ones.<br />
<br />
That night, a child's prayer was answered in what I felt was a miraculous way. What's more, a father learned a powerful lesson that I will never forget: to trust in the Lord, seek his help, and to be patient and believing.<br />
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As Nephi did, my children also teach me many lessons. Yes, it takes humility to recognize them but fathers can and should learn from children valuable lessons for life and living. For that, I am grateful to be a dad.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6725036947232551695.post-8760839128137309992012-02-05T22:04:00.000-05:002012-02-05T22:04:43.511-05:00Father's Blessings...Who Remembers Them?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBq6SsN7YMjKWoQE5SS8uCQaaU6qIdkd-Ezi4DqDK5ZpYPsWqIGOazUXA585rG_CR0VoOZFz95cKvLFr_M_vpSbD3Jymg0iFIlkxAjzfDlljR5MrRtXfQ4zLeeQPEfIhKNACdjuNxfaK_R/s1600/Welcome+Home+Camille_Apr04_004+2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="146" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBq6SsN7YMjKWoQE5SS8uCQaaU6qIdkd-Ezi4DqDK5ZpYPsWqIGOazUXA585rG_CR0VoOZFz95cKvLFr_M_vpSbD3Jymg0iFIlkxAjzfDlljR5MrRtXfQ4zLeeQPEfIhKNACdjuNxfaK_R/s320/Welcome+Home+Camille_Apr04_004+2.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Camille as a new born.</td></tr>
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Today was a special day because two of my friends blessed their babies during sacrament meeting. What a great treat it was to see these faithful men use the power of the priesthood given to them to give a father's blessing to their infant babies as they begin their earthly journey.<br />
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But, who really remembers these blessings? I must admit that I don't; and today I wished that I had documented my children's blessings better. But the infant is too young to remember. And the parents, even if they write the blessing, probably seldom review it or are likely to misplace it and never see it again.<br />
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But that doesn't' matter! What matters is that a father pronounced a blessing by the power of God. What matters is that the blessing is binding and in full force, even when the child isn't aware of it. What matters is that the blessings pronounced are fulfilled even when we don't remember them, even when we take them for granted.<br />
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But today, as my friends pronounced these very special blessings on their respective children, I was reminded of the importance of a father's blessing. They matter, even if we don't remember them.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6725036947232551695.post-11723744074478479182012-01-12T22:13:00.001-05:002012-01-12T22:13:58.933-05:00Out of Small Things...Amidst a lot of important activity, Joseph and many of the church leaders in Kirtland received the following instruction:<br />
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<i>"Wherefore, as ye are agents, ye are on the Lord’s errand; and whatever ye do according to the will of the Lord is the Lord’s business...Wherefore, be not weary in well-doing, for ye are laying the foundation of a great work. And out of small things proceedeth that which is great."</i> (<a href="http://lds.org/scriptures/dc-testament/dc/64?lang=eng" target="_blank">Doctrine & Covenants 64:29, 33</a>).<br />
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This is excellent counsel for us as fathers. We are indeed on the Lord's errand. In fact, we are doing the Lord's business. The work of fatherhood (and of motherhood) is laying the foundation of a great work. Let us not forget or neglect the small things such as:<br />
<ul><li>Studying the scriptures with our families</li>
<li>Praying together every day</li>
<li>Having family meals</li>
<li>Worshiping together and keeping the sabbath of the Lord</li>
<li>Showing respect for one another</li>
<li>Fostering family unity</li>
<li>Having fun together</li>
<li>Setting a good example of righteous living for our children to see and follow</li>
</ul><div>These and many other small things can easily be crowded out by other seemingly important and urgent matters of daily life such as meetings, business travel, school functions, hobbies, sporting events, deadlines, even church activities and callings. Let us focus on what really matters to the Lord and be not weary in these things. For out of small things proceedeth that which is great!</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6725036947232551695.post-324630281519497542011-12-23T09:17:00.000-05:002011-12-23T09:17:46.801-05:00Christmas Time...Family Time<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-IOfv1Hgz_og/TvSJ3aiD_8I/AAAAAAAABHk/4LFLiPUnrws/s1600/Merry+Christmas.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="118" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-IOfv1Hgz_og/TvSJ3aiD_8I/AAAAAAAABHk/4LFLiPUnrws/s200/Merry+Christmas.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>The end of the year can be a very busy time. Shopping, sending cards, planning vacations, wrapping presents, sending presents, closing business cycles, setting goals, traveling, get togethers with friends and family, etc.<br />
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All good endeavors, but none more important than spending time focusing on Christ and family. After all, the only reason we have Christmas is because Christ was born to fulfill His divine mission. And the purpose of His mission is to 'bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man.' And eternal life is only to be achieved in family units.<br />
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Then, let us at Christmas time, celebrate and remember Christ and the hope that is in His infinite atonement. Let us spend quality time with our families and focus on how to make them more 'fit for the kingdom' and happier in this life.<br />
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As fathers, that is our most important charge. All other things will then come into their proper focus at the appropriate time.<br />
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Merry Christmas!!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6725036947232551695.post-12980556181907944082011-12-04T23:47:00.001-05:002011-12-04T23:49:21.903-05:00Meet Bill, a Father IndeedA garbage man, coin collector a fisherman, father of three girls and a special son, and the husband of a dear beloved wife with multiple sclerosis. This is the inspiring story of a devoted husband and father. Take a look.<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.youtube.com/embed/KhqRMP9meMc?feature=player_embedded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div><br />
"It is an honor to be a father!"<br />
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For more inspiring messages visit the <a href="http://www.youtube.com/user/MormonMessages?feature=watch" target="_blank">Mormon Channel</a> on YouTube.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6725036947232551695.post-42395312040519366302011-12-03T08:32:00.004-05:002011-12-03T09:00:04.720-05:0010 Great Christmas Gifts Ideas for Fathers<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhU4enauMdN59Yme9MiWLj9hEqnFDPq-pVinCVw1G1p6r76YtIoID0WwKEMOHCkVf3ebwBICBkgRlx68nPQvsCMuoesvzKwCeTIRqiPPJhZqui4O3gVVXzcWQi_u5SSrV02IYpJqqs-7pjF/s1600/Gift.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhU4enauMdN59Yme9MiWLj9hEqnFDPq-pVinCVw1G1p6r76YtIoID0WwKEMOHCkVf3ebwBICBkgRlx68nPQvsCMuoesvzKwCeTIRqiPPJhZqui4O3gVVXzcWQi_u5SSrV02IYpJqqs-7pjF/s320/Gift.jpg" width="209" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.freedigitalphotos.net/images/view_photog.php?photogid=2423" target="_blank"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: xx-small;">Photo by Naito8</span></a></td></tr>
</tbody></table>Christmas is a time of gift giving. And what child (or adult) does not get excited about what Santa will bring on Christmas morning? For parents (and grandparents) Christmas time means lots of shopping for that special gift. People go to great lengths to obtain that cherished gift or get the bargain that comes once a year only. It can be time consuming and stressful. But parents do it for their loved children even when they know that the excitement of that special surprise on Christmas morning will too soon fade away and the new shiny coveted gift will take its place among the collection of gifts from years past long forgotten.<br />
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But there are gifts all fathers can give their children that are priceless, enduring, and far more valuable than anything money can buy. These gifts may not be received with the excitement and anticipation of a nicely wrapped gift on Christmas morning. These gifts may not even be desired when they are given. But I'm convinced that they will be appreciated long after they are given. So, what are those gifts any father can give their children that have lasting value?<br />
<ol><li>The gift of time</li>
<li>The gift of unconditional love</li>
<li>The gift of knowing they are loved</li>
<li>The gift of happiness</li>
<li>The gift of patience</li>
<li>The gift of hope in the future</li>
<li>The gift of gratitude</li>
<li>The gift of hard work</li>
<li>The gift of righteousness</li>
<li>The gift of faith in God and Jesus Christ</li>
</ol><div>Those are some of the gifts I've received from my father. What gifts have you received from your dad that are of enduring value?</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6725036947232551695.post-27052410665500147212011-11-24T08:23:00.000-05:002011-11-24T08:23:25.946-05:00Things To Be Grateful For as a Father<ul><li>A little one that says "I Love You Daddy"</li>
<li>Finding a 'love note' on the pillow from a little boy or girl.</li>
<li>A child to reminds us about what's most important in life.</li>
<li>A wife to gently bring us back down to reality to help us remember that above all, the most important work we do is at home, not at work.</li>
<li>Being able to play 'tea party' with a little girl.</li>
<li>Having one-on-one discussions with a teen.</li>
<li>Developing patience, faith, hope, and charity dealing with children's challenges.</li>
<li>Feeling the sweet love of God fill our hearts when we find ourselves pleading on our knees for the welfare of our children.</li>
<li>Feeling the promptings of the Holy Ghost as we search for answers to bless our children's lives.</li>
</ul><div>The list goes on and on and on....</div><div><br />
</div><div>What are you grateful for as a dad?</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6725036947232551695.post-12086867555916983302011-11-21T08:23:00.004-05:002011-11-21T09:12:36.891-05:00"As The Lord Commanded Moses"<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-8AKpd0AWJPMM8Fgomzld28WlD3oP3xoBCI5KH8O5zaYROkJr8sYHD10FsH69NRDr88PyV0TUd1w_xB7yG7RAWIYDvVBdHiBx2QfeByMHLXm9Ukr7bVLy8r7gQvEJOtwh69nyNcIEhRRe/s1600/moses-calls-aaron.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="244" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-8AKpd0AWJPMM8Fgomzld28WlD3oP3xoBCI5KH8O5zaYROkJr8sYHD10FsH69NRDr88PyV0TUd1w_xB7yG7RAWIYDvVBdHiBx2QfeByMHLXm9Ukr7bVLy8r7gQvEJOtwh69nyNcIEhRRe/s320/moses-calls-aaron.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Moses ordains Aaron and his sons to minister to Israel</td></tr>
</tbody></table>In <a href="https://lds.org/scriptures/ot/ex/40?lang=eng">Exodus chapter 40</a> we read about the raising of the tabernacle. The pattern here seems quite instructive both at a personal level and at a family level. I wanted to share this because I think this is particularly instructive and relevant to our role as fathers. Read <a href="https://lds.org/scriptures/ot/ex/40?lang=eng">verses 17-38</a>.<br />
<ul><li>Moses reared the Tabernacle as the Lord had commanded him.</li>
<li>Moses finished the work.</li>
<li>A cloud covered the tent.</li>
<li>The glory of God filled the Tabernacle.</li>
<li>The cloud and the fire guided the house of Israel "throughout all their journeys."</li>
</ul><div>Some parallels for fathers to ponder...</div><div><ul><li>We are rearing families unto God.</li>
<li>God has given us instructions as to how to do so and how to conduct our lives to be successful in this work.</li>
<li>We are to do as the Lord has commanded us. As we do as he has commanded...</li>
<li>The glory of God (intelligence, light, and truth) can fill our homes (or tabernacles).</li>
<li>God can give us His 'cloud' or guidance through the Holy Ghost to guide us through all our journeys.</li>
</ul><div>I'd like to hear your insights.</div></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6725036947232551695.post-19395847899234579722011-11-11T06:28:00.004-05:002011-11-11T07:13:08.570-05:00Father Profiles: Meet my friend Tony!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAV2o7Hp4d6ekRihyBe9RfdzkGMh-EIRQnZMD8NA8cXlQly7PJ8jFEzvG1Ebhz6cmoiVf7NHLS_18u6CGF0wivEaeAMZPxos8mMqiNgupDkspovK-ptMACpCbDlomTxVecyuiAivRAozGP/s1600/Tony+Vernaci.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAV2o7Hp4d6ekRihyBe9RfdzkGMh-EIRQnZMD8NA8cXlQly7PJ8jFEzvG1Ebhz6cmoiVf7NHLS_18u6CGF0wivEaeAMZPxos8mMqiNgupDkspovK-ptMACpCbDlomTxVecyuiAivRAozGP/s320/Tony+Vernaci.JPG" width="292" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Kathi and Tony in front of the Grand Hotel<br />
Mackinaw Island, MI</td></tr>
</tbody></table><i>Tony Vernaci is not a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, but attends Kensington, a non-denominational Christian Church in Lake Orion, MI. I invited him to share his thoughts on fatherhood because he exemplifies what any father of any faith ought to emulate as a father. Tony has had a long and successful career in manufacturing, operations, and globalization. Tony, an avid runner, just ran the Detroit marathon. Tony is a dedicated father of four children and lives with his wife Kathi in Rochester Hills, MI.</i><br />
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<b>MF: Tell us about your family</b><br />
TV: We have a blended family because I was married before for nine years and from that I have two boys, Mike, who is 29, and Chris who is 26. After my divorce, Kathi and I met, dated for about three years, got married and then had two kids of our own, TJ who is 20 and Chelsea, who is 17. The nice thing is that blended families present a challenge. If you come to my home you'll see our pictures are family pictures, it's all six of us. And that wasn't just posing for the photographer, Mike and Chris lived in St. Louis Missouri but they would fly up twice a month to be with us. And they did that for 13 years. They'd spend the summer with us, vacation with us. We'd plan vacations around when we could all be together as a family.<br />
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<b>MF: How old we're your boys when you divorced?</b><br />
TV: Mike was 4 and Chris about 1 and a half.<br />
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<b>MF: What was it like to be a single father? What did you learn during that time when you were a single father?</b><br />
TV: I had seen other people that went through similar situations and saw that when they were now single, they were not going home to a family, they were going to their own apartment and started hanging out with the boys, hanging out at the bar. Prior to my divorce I wouldn't think twice about joining the guys for a drink every once in a while but after my divorce I thought 'you know what, that's too dangerous.' Because if I didn't get home before midnight there wasn't anyone at home to ask 'were have you been?' So I decided to stop going to bars and flat out stopped going out with the boys. There was too much risk in that. I had seen people destroy their lives, lose their jobs, just a lot of bad things happened so I stayed away from that.<br />
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The other thing was that I would go to church prior to the divorce but only occasionally. But after the divorce I wanted to give Mike and Chris a religious foundation. So I started taking them with me to church on Sunday and going myself. I was still in Missouri, small town just outside of St. Louis. So I wanted to put a good foundation in their life.<br />
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<b>MF: Did you start attending church mostly for them or for you also?</b><br />
TV: For both actually. I had grown up Catholic, had a catholic education and in the catholic church, divorce is grounds for excommunication. So it was a tough decision and I wondered what would be the effect on the boys but if nothing else, with all the other craziness around the divorce, which was not fun, I needed to put some structure and foundation for both of our lives.<br />
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<b>MF: As you remarried and started another family, what did you did you learn that helped you as a father?</b><br />
TV: When I married the first time I was 18. Mike was born when I was 23 so I was very young. I was more self-centered. I loved them, no question about that. But I do think it was mostly about me. Now, with Kathi, and TJ and Chelsea, I feel like I understand more the role of the father, how important that is, and what I should do and shouldn't do. Although I have not yet perfected the role of being a father by any means. But I think I've learned it's about sacrifice and unconditional love and putting other people before you.<br />
<br />
Also, Kathi and I decided to send the kids through a Christian education because as good as the public schools are, it didn't give them the Christian foundation that we wanted them to have. I'm very glad we did that though there is a trade off. I'm sacrificing the plasma screen in the hallway for a bible in the classroom. I'm not afraid to have the word of God in the daily conversation in the classroom.<br />
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<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><b>MF: What would you say is your biggest joy as a father?</b></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">TV: To see my kids grow and develop, to give them coaching (to them it's lecturing), and guidance and then overtime seeing those things start to resonate and sink in and develop around those same values. Whether its work ethics, faith, managing money, making good decisions. So, it's seeing them develop is a joy and then seeing them go onto their next phase in their life. Specially for my kids because I have such a range. My daughter Chelsea is 17 and Mike is 29 and there's is two in between. So I get to see the spectrum, not like a younger family where you are still wondering how is this is all going to come out. So, it's neat to see that.</div><br />
<b>MF: How has your faith influenced your role as a father and your relationship with your family?</b><br />
TV: Even after my divorce, when I was going to church, I was just checking the box, I was just filling a seat in the pew, I wasn't really engaging my heart and soul with what was around me. And you know, they say God has a funny way of bringing you to your knees. Well, in 2000, there was a lot of turmoil in the economy, we had two homes, one we thought would sell fast, so we bought the new one before we sold the old one and ended up with two houses for about 13 months, big mistake. So I was down and so concerned about my job because the company where I was working had been sold and things weren't good. And so I was scared, and Kathi gave me a couple of books to read. One was the Bible and others about Christ and the love of Christ and it really helped me to understand my role as a father. Because my role, the way I see it today is really no different than the role of the Heavenly Father. Now, I'm not putting myself in that same line, but my point is that there are some times when our kids disappoint us. You do things for them and you may not feel like there is an appreciation. You wish they would behave differently but they do something else, and you think 'they just don't get it.' but then you sit down and think and realize that we do that to God every day. We may not give thanks before you have a meal and it's a gift he has given us. The clothes on our back, the car we drove here, the home we live in, I mean, if you think about it, we are showered with gifts every day and do we always recognize he is the giver of all that we have? We don't. And then we don't treat people the way we should or we are not honest in all our words. So it's given me a better perspective of how God looks upon us and our behavior and I think that's my role as a dad, to treat my kids the same way with unconditional love, you love the sinner but you hate the sin. And you have to be patient with them. There will be times that as teenagers they won't necessarily come to you for the advice when you wish they would and you just have to be patient with them and open the door for them and welcome them back again. So it's really opened up my eyes and changed my perspective.<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><b><br class="Apple-interchange-newline" />MF: I know you make breakfast for your kids. What are some other traditions you have developed to foster your relationship with them?</b></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">TV: When we first got married we were boaters, so we'd spend our weekends over on Lake St. Clair. Golfing was never a sport that interested me, plus I didn't want to take more time away from the family. So we boated for ten years over there. It was good family entertainment. And to this day every one of my kids will say that when they have their families and get settled, they want to have a boat and want to take their kids out on a boat. Growing up, my dad had a house boat on the Mississippi and that's where my love for boats comes from, because I remember those weekends with my dad on the boat. So, those kinds of things we love. And then, we vacation together. We take trips together. They don't have to be trips to Hawaii, they can be quick trips up north, or go down to Cedar Point for a day. And then I try to give the kids time individually. So, TJ and I will go to a hockey game. Actually, Chelsea likes hockey too, so she and I will go to a game. And I love those nights out with them, we'll go out for a burger someplace and go to a hockey game and Chelsea whom you might not think had any interest in sports at all enjoys doing that. So I try to have that individual time with them. It's hard with a bigger family. It doesn't have to be every week but you have to set aside the time somewhere to be with the kids individually, even if it's shopping for school supplies.</div><br />
<b>MF: Have there been other dads you have come to admire and why?</b><br />
TV: Kathi's sister is married to a guy who is a terrific dad. He has deep roots in his faith. Recently they experienced cancer. I've known them for many years. He is someone I have a lot of respect for.<br />
<br />
Two other guys that were very influential were Ted Harris, a business associate. One day he came to pick up a check because he did work for us as a vendor. So I gave him the check and as he was leaving he turned around and said 'hey, there is a handful of guys that get together every Tuesday in my office, kind of a small Bible study, if you want and come join us.' I had always been very internalized about my faith, so it was uncomfortable, but I started going to that and it really helped me grow a lot. I saw the way Ted raised his family. He had challenges in his family but he was a wonderful man of God, and a great, great father through all the challenges he had.<br />
<br />
And then my doctor, Joe. Who I met through Ted. He led a small Bible study at Woodside Bible church, he was the group leader for that, so Joe and I have become very close through Ted.<br />
<br />
Those are guys I have pretty high regard for. The funny thing is that as much as I admire these guys, there are also people that I've seen that do things that I think are terribly wrong. And so you learn from that too. For instance I saw some of that through my parents divorce. Things I didn't want to repeat. So you learn, even from the bad examples.<br />
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<b>MF: What would you say to a new dad, what would be your advice?</b><br />
TV: Even though we sent our kids to Christian school, we say a prayer before each meal, and we love going to church, now more than ever before, the one thing we didn't do was to necessarily sit down to read the Bible together. And it wasn't because I felt like they were getting that at school, so the job is done. But I can see a difference in families we've observed throughout the years, that spend time, and it doesn't have to be a long time, it can be 15 minutes a day, maybe at meal time. That meal time together is valuable. For busy families, it's hard to do but whenever you can, have a meal together and spend quality time together. It's hard but you've got to make the effort because life will give you too many excuses to not do what you really should do. I just had this conversation with one of my sons I said, tithe to the church, just make it part of your budget, that's what you do first. Save for your kid's college and be in the word. Not in that order necessarily, but that will be the best foundation to build your family and your future on.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0